Wedding Wednesday: The Best Wedding Advice I’ve Heard

When it comes to wedding planning things. Are. Happening. Venue, photographer, videographer, and band booked? Check! Dress? Check! My wedding ring purchased? Check! Almost all save the dates addressed and stamped? Check (and squeal)! (We’re waiting for this snowstorm to end before we mail them. Yes I actually considered the weather.) Florist decided? Check! One block of rooms at a hotel reserved? Check! Meeting with a potential officiant this weekend? Yep!

I wasn’t lying when I said things were happening : )

With so much big stuff moving along nicely, I’ve been pondering some of the smaller details for the big day. I feel like I talk about details here quite often, but once we write the ceremony and address a few more big items, that’s really what’s left. And though it feels challenging at times trying to find my groove, it’s also a heck of a lot of fun to daydream about what the day will look and feel like.

If I may go off on a little tangent for a moment, sometimes I consciously notice how quickly an average weekend or a Saturday goes by and think to myself “That’s the entire length of our wedding weekend. That’s it!” It’s been a great reminder of just how quickly the weekend will fly by and I’ve heard it goes by even faster than I can imagine. It also helps me rein in, to some extent, how much planning I intend to do because I could easily spend the next seven months (from tomorrow!) planning every little detail for two days that will pass by in an instant.

But there’s something even more powerful that’s helped me rein in my daydreams (and Etsy browsing and SMP stalking). My sister reminded me of it when I sent her the link below last week. It’s a quote from a bride on the loveliest blog I discovered a few months ago, Em for Marvelous. The blogger’s sister-in-law wrote this about her own wedding:

We recognize it would have been different if it hadn’t rained — our guests would have gotten the chance to stroll the grounds during cocktail hour, our mothers’ hair would not have been flattened, and we would have had the photographs I had imagined. But our wedding wasn’t a photo shoot, and everyone we loved was there, whether their blowout held or not.”

Our wedding wasn’t a photo shoot.

How easy is that to forget? (Right brides?) After all, so much of the inspiration we see comes from photos so it’s easy to blur the lines and forget the truth: our wedding is not a photo shoot.

Sure, we’ve hired awesome photographers for the day, but we’re not two people dressing up as a bride and groom pretending to get married. We are getting married (!!!)  So when I start conjuring up images of us holding a thank you banner or the ring bearer carrying a cute sign, or the bridesmaids getting ready in the same attire or doing anything else I wouldn’t normally do I simply remind myself our wedding is not a photo shoot.

This is the very best filter when it comes to considering which details matter and which don’t. If an idea for a detail is only for a cute photo then I scratch it right away. If an idea will enhance our own experience or our guests’ experience in some way then we consider it. If it just so happens to make for a great photo along the way, well bonus. But that’s not the intention.

If it were entirely up to me, we wouldn’t take a single formal photo the entire day. For me, it’s about capturing those moments before, during, and after we become husband and wife. Plus, all of the joy, emotion, and celebration that comes with that as well as sharing the experience with our favorite people in the world.

Those are the moments that make the day and the weekend as wonderful and as meaningful as it will be. And for me, those are the moments I want to be able to hold onto, and continue, as long as we both shall live.

One thought on “Wedding Wednesday: The Best Wedding Advice I’ve Heard

  1. Em

    Love this post! (And thank you for the sweet mention!) One little thought: Though I am entirely on board with wanting to capture things as they unfold, I wouldn’t entirely scratch off “formal” photos. A great photographer can do them in a wonderfully informal way, and those still photos of you with your parents or siblings will likely be priceless down the line! 🙂

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